Twelve Things about Yours, Mine and Ours (Remake)
12. One of the filmmakers said he didn't want to do a movie about eighteen white kids. Now, as an Angelina Jolie fan, I would have respected his
11. The two opening sequences aren't bad, especially since the viewer is introduced to twenty main characters (the eighteen kids and their two widowed parents) all at once. Every child has a distinct personality quirk. If only the first day of school were this easy for me.
10. "Just because [they] got married, we all have to suffer." I'm kind of cynical about what a twice-married relative of mine calls "ready-made families" being able to get along immediately. But these kids have no baggage and no reason not to get along, so I have no sympathy for their self-entitlement, either. (Written like a true adult. I'm getting old . . .)
9. All families are different, but differences have to be dramatised to the point of farce in these movies. So here we have . . .
Headed by someone who says:
There goes my dream of an all-family sailing team
Raised by someone who says:
Homes are for free expression, not for good impressions.
How to get them to get along???
8. "Operation Lighthouse" would be a cool (and very thematic) title for that alternative movie about a fictional "ready-made" family.
7. And yet the lighthouse itself had to be digitally added to the set! (Not only Action movies benefit from new film technology!)
The sea in the background was added in, too. And it's just as significant! Not only because the father is in the US Coast Guard--because that is yet another symbol for the family in this story.
6. I know the lesson is about learning to live with and love people one has nothing in common with--which is the very definition of a (functional) family--but which family would you rather have come from?
When I polled my brothers, I got these answers . . .
Camera Man: The Norths
"Because the mom is free and fun!"
Cue-card Boy: The Beardsleys
"Because the dad is disciplined!"
(I know, right?!?!?!)
5. "A clean ship is a happy ship!" Okay, but whatever happened to "The family that prays together, stays together?"
But these North-Beardsleys aren't Catholic, either. I guess eighteen Catholic kids would have been too much for that aforementioned filmmaker as well? (Strangely, I'm not taking that personally.)
4. Why does something ridiculous always happen to the father? In this movie alone, he has half a hardware store dumped on him, gets a can of paint stuck on his foot, lands face-first in wallpaper glue, and kisses a pig.
I used to think it was a convention of modern children's movies . . . but then I reread Peter Pan last month and saw that the properly Victorian J.M. Barrie makes light of Mr. Darling, too. Is this a Freudian thing, then?
3. Soundtrack time!!! You have to love a movie that ends on a note like this . . .
2. It makes one wish this were the pilot of a TV series rather than a movie that may never get a sequel. I got the sense that the story was just beginning.
1. Now, for the one millionth time . . . Meg Ryan left Dennis Quaid for Russell Crowe??? WHY???
Image Sources: a) Yours, Mine and Ours poster, b) Operation Lighthouse, c) House with Lighthouse